Counsellors undergo a unique process of identity development. Previous research shows that the therapeutic alliance and the therapists' use of self have greater impact on therapy outcomes than the specific techniques used. Thus, counsellor development involves integrating new skills, knowledge, and theory with a more in-depth knowledge of self and others resulting in a qualitative change in the self of the counsellor. The creation of this blended personal-professional identity is often accompanied by anxiety, insecurity, and distress. Previous research has focused on improvements to educational programs and supervision practices aimed primarily at educators and researchers. This thesis was written by and for the beginning practitioner with the intent of adding a personal dimension to the existing research. Evocative autoethnography was used to explore counsellor development from an affective, relational, and intimate perspective with the hope of both normalizing and celebrating a powerfully transformative experience. --Leaf ii.
