Page 18 March 1982 Cassiar Courier NORTHERN LIGHTS COLLEGE MOTHER HUBBARD PARKA WORKSHOP — For yourself or for your child — March 12, 13 and 14, Instructor is Trudy Ben- nett. Please register early as supplies have to be ordered from Dawson Creek. LIMIT — 8 registrants. EXCEPTIONAL BLUE JEANS — Personalized fit, professionally sewn for adults or children. Learn How to sew blue jeans from by Ellen Corcoran ‘an expert teacher who has given workshops all over Alberta. Course will be offered March 22, 23 and 24. Please register early as supplies have to be ordered from Dawson Creek. LIMIT — 8 registrants. PHOTOGRAPHY WORKSHOP — Susanne Swibold from Calgary will be the instructor for this course and the dates will be announced later. LIMIT — 10. STANDARD ST JOHNS AMBULANCE FIRST AID (SENIOR) This course will consist of seven 3 hour sessions and the in- structor will be Don Toth. It will be held evenings and the dates will be announced later. AIR BRAKE — Gerry Cooper is the instructor and the dates will be announced later. To register for any of these courses or for information regard- ing Northern Lights College please call Ellen Corcoran: at 778-7638. ; : SOFTLY by Sian Jones Softly the cat creeps around. Softly he creeps without.a sound. - Softly the baby cries. Softly the cry dies. Softly comes the day. Softly the day goes away. Softly! This is the world speaking. So you want to see me. Before you do, see a travel agent. SAFETY POINTERS FOR PARENTS AND BABY SITTERS submitted by Sue Borden When parents hire a baby sitter they should know that the — sitter will remain calm if the child happens to be in danger; one who will not frighten the child and make the event an important one. A good sitter will go to the child quietly and calmly, suggest some other activity while leading him away from the danger spot. /f the sitter becomes agitated, the child enjoys the reaction he may have provoked and may even repeat it another time. The good sitter will use the same procedure when he is trying to pull a lamp off the table, or grabs a sharp knife. She will use the quiet calm approach and engage the child in some other interesting activity. A lot of fuss on the sitters part leads only to a repetition of dangerous or hazardous acts. !. The parent should make use of a form such as “What Our Baby Sitter Should Know’ to make certain all necessary information is handy for the sitter. 2. The parent should instruct the sitter as to exactly what the child is to eat and drink and howit is to be prepared. The sitter should give him-no food except that provided specif- ically by the parent. 3. The parents should warn the sitter that certain small, hard foods like nuts or popcorn are dangerous for a baby or young child to have as they can be inhaled causing suf- focation, 4. The parent should tell the sitter where the child may play, both indoors and out. 5. The parent should make sure no firearms or other known dangerous articles are accessible for a child (or a young sitter) to get at. 6. The parent should warn the sitter concerning any specific safety instructions with respect to her child and her home. 7. The parent should introduce the family pet (if there is one). If the dog is of a jealous or overprotective nature, he ' should be confined by the parent before the sitter arrives, and the parent should explain before leaving why the dog has been confined. Because a travel agent knows more about me than anyone else on me. About my business life and my nightlight. My fun cities and my sun countries. My changing nature. My different times. See my Bermudas. My Canaries. My Jamaica. See me in June or January. See my Red Square, my.Orange Bowl. My Northern lights, my Southern Cross. See the whole, wide me. A week here...a weekend there. Or weeks at atime. But first see your travel agent. American Socie of Travel Agents Your travel agent knows more about me than anyone else on me. arves Travel Service Ltd. 164 ELLIOT STREET CASSIAR 778-7220 (Trailer next to Curling Rink) DOMESTIC & INTERNATIONAL TRAVEL BY AIR - SEA CRUISES -- RAIL — BUS -- HOTEL RESERVATIAM -— CAR HIRE AMD RENTAL — PASSPORT —- VISAS -- TRAVEL INSURAMCE AN) OTHER TRAVEL SERVICES. BIINGET CHARTERS AVAILABLE FOR ALL SEASONS TRAVEL. OFFICE HOURS: 9:30 a.m. to 5:30 p.m. WEEKDAYS, 9:30 a.m. to 1:00 p.m. SATURDAYS (OPEN DURING LIIMCH HOURS) CLOSED ALL DAY SUNDAY Charles Templeton: THE THIRD TEMPTATION, Seal Books, 285p., $3.50. The Roman a Clef, is an interesting type of story. Filled with the faces of thinly disguised real people it asks you to figure Out who the players really are. That is no problem in this novel, for the focus on the main character is so strong that the others pale by comparison. Jimmy Coulter has it all. At the age of sixty he has, for over 20 years, been America’s leading evangelist. He is married to a beautiful woman, He has pover and a good life. But it is all a sham, based on a wrong decision taken in 1956. The year is significant, for the real-life Charles Templeton left a similar career in 1955 and became a journalist, reversing the process gone through by his character. His decision to leave the ministry was motivated by a crisis of. faith similar to Coulter’s and one is pressed to conclude that this is his look down the road he decided -not to take. This story is assembled in various ways. Part is straight forward narrative. The rest is memos, letters and newspaper copy, all the product of the Hoffman newspaper chain, whose owner, _Hugh Huffman, has decided’ to destroy Coulter’s career if at all possible. The reason for his resolve seems cheap and tawdry until his victim visits him late in the story and uncovers a deeper motive. Hoffman too, is a success who has lost his idealism and sense of purpose. Despising himself he has set out to test a man who appears to be what he’ is not. Having found a weakness he has to expose it, mostly to save his own conscience. | expected this to be a somewhat routine bestseller, but it turned out to have more meat on it than: expected. It was quite good, ; Gordon R. Dickson: THE SPIRT OF DORSAI ($2.50) LOST DORSAI ($2.95) The saga has become a popular form in recent years. One publisher after another has come out with convoluted family histories and pseudo-historical mastodons filled with stereotypes J.R.s and improbable sexual antics. When it comes to sagas the histories science-fiction writers had a head start on everybody else. Nearly every writer in the genre has his or her own version of what the next millennium or ~~ two will be like. One of the best is Dickson’s Childe Cycle. When complete, this will include two historical novels, two set in the 20th century and six set in various eras of the future. These. two books are not part of the mainstream of that series. In her essay in Lost Dorsai, critic Sandra Miesel gives a valuable overview of the Childe novels and terms these volumes illuminations. As such they fill in details just sketched briefly in the novels Tactics of Mistake, Dorsai and Soldier, Ask Not, details which flesh out the society and culture of Dickson’s warrior people, the Dorsai. Each volume contains one novella and one short story. “Amanda Morgan’ tells how the women and children of Dorsai defeated the legions of Earth with hardly a battle. Its heroine is the 92 year old lady of the title. “Brothers” tells of the death of Kensie Graeme at the hand's of an assassin and how he was avenged by his twin brother, lan. “Lost Dorsai” is the story of a trained warrior who dared to be a pacifist in the face of war and who found a way to defeat his enemies without firing a single weapon. “Warriors” is a look at the code of the Dorsai, seen once again through the actions of lan Graeme. ; Both volumes are heavily illustrated and originally appeared as trade paperbacks. Both are good reading. PADOOOQOOQOOOOOOOOCOOOOCO OC COCOOCC CCC oOo LIONS CLUB LOTO - PROVINCIAL WESTERN EXPRESS ~ THE CASSIAR LIONS CLUB IS NOW SELLING THESE TICKETS AND THEY CAN BE PURCHASED FROM ANY LIONS CLUB MEMBER. FOR FURTHER INFORMATION PLEASE CALL DEREK VALKER AT 778-7698. ASOOOOCOCOCOCOCOOCOOOOCOCO COCO COCO OOOO OOOO OOO OooO SOLDUSTER by John Sturrock. CHAPTER 6 Granite Hawg was a huge rock hurrying through space at 35,000 miles per second, A disconcerting speed! On Granite Hawg was a settlement of-miners, servicemen and scientists of all dis- ciplines. There was also an employment office for new hires, a lab crew, areck centre, a hospital and a parking lot. Granite Hawg had no atmosphere, sunlight or water. One had to be highly enthusias- tic about everything to live and work on Granite Hawg. It was named after its discoverer, Billy the Pig, who was a mendicant dealer in second hand space junk. Granite was the quality of his mercy and Hawg needs no further explanation! This lump of rock, some 18 miles wide and 40 miles long, was Sundusters’ first port of call to deliver various amounts of atmosphere sunlight, water, heat, food, mail and 30 tons of toilet paper. They must live pretty high on the hawg, on the Hawg! In return Sunduster received information on foreign satelites, ship- ments of ore concentrates, results of scientific experiments in vegetation and other life forms. The Hawg's goal was to be self- supporting in 25 years and was politically anti CIA! Naturally, living as they did, they welcomed everbody with a massive party’ CCC style. They were expecting Sunduster and — therefore were scanning to the south in a heavy duty fashion. And when Sunduster showed up in their scopes they hit the Switches and the speakers got busy! “Hello Sunduster, Granite Hawg here at your mercy, whooee baby where are you happening man?” “Hello Hawg Sunduster here, never mind where we are, where the hell are you? We are supposed to find you, not us!” “Well Sunduster, aren’t we snippy this glorious AM! At ‘35,000 miles per parsec we can’t always wait for the traffic light!” ; ““O.K! O.K! O.K! Where are we then?” “Hey Sunduster baby hello! You're a mile west in a southerly direction. Point her north and we'll meet tomorrow noon!” “Are the docks clear Hawg?” : “Heck no baby, we've got the whole bleeding British Navy and a Yankee Yacht Regatta with their white sails and little blue hulls dancing about all over the harbour. So drive carefully and quit smoking! What have you got for us, Tuna fish?” The usual Hawg plus 30 tons of toilet paper. You must live pretty high on the hawg, Hawg!” “We have our moments Sunduster, we do have our moments!” “Hold it Hawg, Hold it, Row wants to sing his newest latest song. Go ahead Row, sing it pretty! Right here in the mike Row walked over to the mike, and twinging his guitar sang his newest little song! “1 was poignant all nite The day you left! Gwendolyn it was fine, For | found a little Snooky And a bottle of good French wine! Oh Gwendolyn, don’t you weep for me! For 1'm off to Nova Scotia With my Snooky on my knee!” “That's an adorable ballad Sunduster, has he got any more?” “Just a minute Hawg, Herbie wants to play his mouth organ and sing a little song too! Go ahead Herbie”. “Red snails in the snunset Are pretty to me! And slobsters and kinoctopi Look very juiceee! So oh for a herring, So oh for a char, And oh for a catfish !na pickled Hoolibar! A ling cod is nice /n mustard and spice And crocodile tail All sprinkled with ice! Yummy Yummy Yummy! /t motivates my tummy! Now Hawg | have a little poem, me Capt. Ernie, poet at large, using vague alludings to in modern forms! Ahem! Sunduster Sunduster, Big Buster three, A Strive for littleness Sig niffy cantly! Budgies for the Bittern, Parrots are free! Strive for littleness! Signiffy cantly! Oh how it stings! “By the way Hawg, when we unload the groceries, be careful because the retail store isnot a double bagger!” “0. K. Sunduster, whats next on the program?” “Well Hawg, BH92 is proudly announcing its annual spring gigantic Hood. fire, hurrican, civil war and eviction sale! Ahem! A hemitty! BH92 PROUDLY PRESENTS! There’s a space for you in 92! The house of organic rooms! Its yearly gigantic sale! Proceeds to be donated to the Lions Club! Our only competitor! FOR SALE! 3 crates of freshly chopped furniture. 2 barrels of crisp socks. 7 barrel of shrunken undervear, which could be used for mitt liners! 812 cases of empties (in the janitor closet). 21 magnificent rooms for sale. Every one with a view! Most of them with doors! 13 boxes of matured cigar butts. 4 complete do it yourself tattoo kits. 5 dune buggies (winterized). 2 human skeletons with boots! 38 almost new door locks with extra handles and keys! 1 grader transmission. : 1 grader blade (needs teeth). 14 cartons of assorted knives, forks and spoons. 84 used brooms! “Well dearie me Sunduster if | ain’t a two toed tension tester if that ain't just the exotic most! You got anymore vast comedy in the booby box?” Cassiar Courier March 1982 Page 19 - “Hell Hawg we got a million jokes so hang in there, ‘Deadly Nervous’ wishes to sing.” “Glorp” said the completely vicious plant! Then in a dry - hollow rusty rumbly scratchy monotors, he sang his song! “Glorp! Oh | married all my loved ones! Then | boiled them in tea! All my lovely lovely loved ones Drank | Their health To me! Glorp!” “Also” said Deadly Nervous, “did you know that Fingals fungous is found in Fongals cave on the northern coast of Flaffa?” “No Sunduster | didn’t?” “Also” cried Herbie Fonghammer, “did you know that Fluxley’s flayer is the fiddle flayer of 3 flayers faking up the finner foot sheath flayer of a fair follicle?” “No | didn’t! Sunduster!” “Also”, shouted Row Ringdance, “did you know that Foomer Fermats flast fleorem wherein there is no non fero folut- ion in fintegars for the fequation a*+ b" = c*vherein nis great- er than m?” DON’T THROW AWAY ANY PRESCRIPTION GLASSES — EVEN IF YOU HAVE ONLY THE LENS. THE LIONESS CLUB COLLECTS THESE TO SEND TO- UNDER PRIVILEGED COUNTRIES IF YOU HAVE ANY PLEASE CONTACT RITA BROWN 291 CARMACKS ST, PH. 778-7216 SALTWATER BRIG MORE IRISH THAN.A COBBLESTONE FROM DUBLIN..... MORE GAELIC THAN A DONNEGAL TWEED..... AS REMINISCENT OF IRISH TRADITIONS AS THE BLARNEY STONE , ITSELF....... pee SHOWING TUESDAY MARCH 2nd at the Cassiar Theatre at 8p.m. <