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JANUARY 19, 2005

Gosh... What an Awesome Movie

Br KATHLEEN DE VERE

NEws EpITOR

Hey look! It’s another teen movie
with a cookie cutter plot! Awkward,
yet redeeming, teen hero wins the big
school election, gets the girl, and gains
acceptance among his peers. Only
not.

Like its title character, Napoleon
Dynamite is an odd, yet strangely
humouros movie. The characters
don’t so much deliver jokes as they just
act and say things - sometimes you'll

find them funny, sometimes you won't,-
but in the strange warped. world of

Napoleon Dynamite, everything is a
bit off, a little twisted, and often so
serious it’s totally ridiculous.
Ostensilly, the movie is about
Napoleon’s life and the people in it:

He whines, he

sighs, he does
totally weird
crap, but what
Napeleon never
contemplates is
holding back or
not doing just
what he wants to
do.

Napolcon’s useless older brother’s
online social life, his uncle’s failing
attempts to return to his 1982 glory
days, and Napolcon’s slightly misguid-
ed cfforts to get through school, gct
dates, get his best bud Pedro clected
class president, and deal with Deb,
who may like him.

All this small, yet often hilarious

Loser Comedy turns out to be a real Winner

drama is played out against the land
that time forgot - a small Midwestern
town where the music is from thc 90s,
the kids dress like they’re in the 80s,
and all the furniture and vehicles are
from the 70s. This anacronistic setting
provides the perfect background for
the movie - everything is as odd and
out of place at Napoleon himself.

Dynamite stumbles through his life
(literally and figuratively) and never
quite seems to grasp what people
should do and say to get things right.
Jealous of his friend Pedro’s skills with
girls (cake-baking skills to be exact) he
uses his drawing skills to make a pic-
ture of a girl he wants to take to the
dance. His pick up line? “There’s
plenty more where that came from if
you go to the dance with mc... it took
me two hours to do the shading on
your upper lip.”

Hc whines, he sighs, he does totally
weird crap, but what Napoleon never
contemplates is holding back or not
doing just what he wants to do.
Freedom is the theme that dominatcs
this movie, from the noerending
prairie farmland that makes up to the
surrounding arca, to Napolcon’s atti-
tude.

“What are you going to do today
Napoleon?” asks a kid on Napolcon’s
bus. _

“Whatever I want to do! Gosh!” is
his childishly huffy reply, as if there is
no other way to go about these things.

Above all, Napoleon Dynamite is a
fiendishly subjective movic. Half the
pcople who have secn it found it end-
lessly hilarious, others thought it was
just endlessly ridiculous, and still oth-
ers were completcly ambivalent
towards it. Some call Napolcon
Dynamite the Forrest Gump of the
MTV gencration, but regardless of
what people think about it, this movic
is odd, creative, and if you like that
sort of thing, pretty damn funny.

PS ty Fj “Sete
Darkhorse 7 oy

This weck, we will take a look at
the latest manga rendition of the
stories the universe of the acclaimed
horror movie “The Ring”. The vol-
ume, entitled “Birthday”, contains
three short storics which arc intend-
ed to cxplain some of the morc
obscure aspects of the storyline of
“The Ring” and “Spiral”. The first
story, “The Casket Floating-in the
Sky” tells the story of the last days of
the life of Mai Sakano, who dicd in
“Spiral”. It turns out that Mai’s last
days were apparently very disjoint-
ced, and made almost no sense at all.
Thus, the tale docs very little to

Death Meta!

Strangely cnough Into, Eternity is
actually a Canadian band from
Saskatchewan and has been that
way for about four years.

Now here is the best part, I don’t
know any otlicr band that thcy
sound like. Into Eternity has some-
how managed to create a sound that
is specific only to them.

They arc stuck somewhere
between traditional growling death
metal lyrics and styles the likes that
might be expected from other

explain the bizarre events that made
Mai’s death so important to the
vengeful schemes of the evil Sadako.

Tle remaining storics in the vol-
ume do a decent job of explaining
the reasons Sadako has for unleash-
ing her plague on the word.
“Lemon Heart” tells of the tragic
love Sadako endured before her
death, while “Sadako” tells of the
twisted life and strange condition
that Ied her to hate the human racc.

The whole of “Birthday” is dis-
jointed and difficult to follow. It does
explain some of the back story of
“The Ring”, but it docs not justify
any of it, nor does it make the read-
er really understand why thie story
needed to take place.If you really

liked “Fhe Ring” and “Spiral” the

way that they are, then there really is
no necd to read this follow-up book.

Canadian acts like Widow Maker.
However their sound then swings to
be light and high pitch; comparable
to today’s main stream rock.

The song Splintercd Visions was
probably the most well rounded
song on Buricd In Oblivion. It com-
bined all of Into Eternity’s experi-
mental clements, and truly came
together into a cohesive whole. This
song was the lynchpin of the album
for mc.

For tlic few of us who find the
necd to acquire more Ganadian
music Into Eternity is a blessing.
Though the band doesn’t have a
style that everyone would cnjoy who
spends their resouncs acquiring

Practice Typing and Ki

The Typing of the Dead
Sega, 20

With today’s high emphasis on
computer technology, and the wide-
spread digitization of data, touch
typing is a skill that everyone should
Icarn.

Unfortunately, most of the soft-
ware for lcarning to type is boring
as hell. Not anymorc, however,
since Scga released its “l'yping of
the Dead” a few years back. Now,
you can learn to type, and kill zom-
bics, all at the samc time!

The Typing of the Dead is pret-
ty much the same game as House of
the Dead 2, except instead of
shooting zombics, you type them to
death.

The main character graphics

have cven been “altered ‘to haye
these odd ba¢kpacks with keyboard
attachments instead of guns. It is
quite possibly one of the weirdest
and funnicst games that has ever
been made.

Besides the original story and
arcade modcs, there arc the tutori-
al, drill, and boss modes. ‘Uhe tuto-
rials teach you how to tough type
properly, and the drills are like your
standard typing drills, except you
have to kill zombic hordes before
they can kill you. Boss mode Icts
you fight any boss from the arcade
and original modcs,

‘This game has old-style graphics,
and what is possibly the worst
voice-acting on the planct. But, it is
a ton of fun to play, and you can
learn uscful life skills at the same
time. Plus, you can download the

It is based on the novel by Koy
Suzuki, who wrote all of the original
novels, but it would scem that this
manga version did not do Suzuki’s
vision full justice.

>> DAN

rnore cxtreme metal.

If you want to support your local
industry-you might as well look them
up.
>> RUSSELL.

Il Zombies

gamc for free.

Go to http://gr. bolt.com/down-

load/pc/action/typing of%20 the
dcead.htm and use onc of the fine

links provided to download the
game, and you too can cnjoy the
powcr of killing zombies with the
blinding specd of your fingers.

>> Dana ,