10 arts & entertainment

March 16, 2011 + Over the Edge

Book Review: And the Heart Says Whatever

So does the reader

DARCY SMITH
ARTS EDITOR

Emily Gould’s recent book of memoirs, And the Heart Says
Whatever, shares a number of essays on growing up and
attempting to establish herself as a professional in New
York City. While she goes through her memories and
mishaps, it’s evident that she is also attempting to establish
herself not only as a writer, but a writer who has something
worth saying. Initially, the book seems like it might be

one worth finishing, but after reading two or three of the
essays it becomes arduous and boring, and it seems like

a chore to get to the finish. Gould really has nothing new
or astounding to say about life and love, so reading to the
final pages is entirely underwhelming. There is a mild level
of entertainment, but at a certain point the book gets put
down on a coffee table and completely forgotten about. It
all too easily becomes the “oh, right, | need to finish that
book.” It’s an easy read, with simple, snarky language so
committing to it for a week or two can at least provide you
with the accomplishment that you actually finished reading

a book for once.

Gould talks a lot about her failed relationship with Joseph, a

twenty-something guy in a local band, who seems to have
no real ambition. She speaks very casually of their ultimate
demise and how he was not the first (or last) of her many
boyfriends that she was unfaithful to. She certainly seems
to accept that her quest for finding true love seems highly
dependent on whether or not they are worth committing to,
but her lack of concern is not respectable. Even the title of
her book leads the reader to believe that she is indifferent to
her “whatever” lifestyle, but it seems like a bit of an act. If
she was not worried about how she drove her relationship
with Joseph into the ground, then why is he mentioned in
almost every chapter, even when it is not remotely related to
him? She makes the point of saying that about six months
after they broke up, they met for dinner so she could let

him read over something she'd written about him. He had
asked that she remove what she wrote so that it wouldn't
say how much pot the two of them smoked. But, really,

she may have removed the information, but still telling the
reader about his request certainly defeats the purpose of

doing so.

Wedding Bells are Ringing

Golden bells to be precise

MARY BERGER
CONTRIBUTOR

Anyone who’s someone will be attending the wedding of
Edward Theodore Crock and Brenda Anne-Marie on the 25th
and 26th of March in the UNBC NUSC Event Space. Why
the lovebirds chose those dates is beyond my wits, but when
you're as wealthy as their families, you can afford to plan as
many weddings as you want!

The father of the bride, Harold Montague, is the highly
educated CEO of a major corporation. With his position, he
can afford as many weddings as he wants for his already
thrice-married daughter Brenda and wife, Mildred. Mildred’s
fondness of wedding bars will likely have Harold taking on a
second job. But that’s not all the party favours that will be
garnishing the NUSC event space on those days; stir-fried
possum, hog jowls and pickled pig feet are rumoured to be
a requested side dish of the groom that will compliment the
chicken, beef or vegetarian main dishes.

The groom, Edward Crock, grew up in Pilot Knob, a small

Everything 3D

Is it getting to be a little much?

BIANCA CHORABIK
CLUBS EDITOR

Are you getting sick of walking into a show and having
everything popping out at you? The problem begins with
the fact that every movie, from the expected action movie
to the totally unnecessary Yogi Bear, is being displayed

in 3D. Some people wear glasses and it’s inconvenient to
wear classes over your glasses. Then you have people
who get migraines and go cross-eyed from the unnatural
projection of images on screen. However, it doesn’t stop at
the theaters. Oh, no. Now home entertainment systems are
being designed to complete in this 3D trend.

The first anaglphmovie, which is the type of 3D movie that
uses the classic red and blue glasses, was invented in 1915
by L.D. DuHaron. That man started something terrible.
After him, many different formed of 3D media came about
and now with newer, more advanced technology, we’ve
eliminated the need for the multi-coloured lenses. And now,
it's possible to purchase a 3D television for your very own
living room.

Though most of the purchasable 3D monitors require
eyewear, they have come up with a solution to this problem.
In 2010, Toshiba created the first “naked-eye 3D display,”
technically known as the nine parallax 3D image. This
method uses images from nine different angles to produce
a single 3D image. This display is achieved by using a
lenticular lens sheet on a high-definition LCD panel, so it’s
as though you’re gazing through a window. The images
don’t come up to your face, like they do with 3D glasses;

rural community that continues to elude world maps to this
day. After dropping out of school, he became employed at
the local automobile/construction site building. After years
of becoming admirably skilled at constructing the boxes in
which drive shafts are transported, Edward quit. The late
Edward Crock Senior bequeathed to his son Edward Jr.
and wife Sheila Crock his financial remains from a winning
PowerBall ticket, jettisoning the family out of the backwater
woods of Pilot Knob and into the life of luxury. Fast forward
several years and you have two families footing the bill for
one of the most talked about weddings of the year.

In what many of the elite scene would consider gauche
fashion, the Crock wedding will be charging for admittance of
$15 for students and $20 for adults, which can be purchased
at the NUGSS office, Books & Co. or from the UNBC Drama
Club, one of Crock Senior’s favourite charity foundations.
Dinner will be served at 6:30pm, the reception beginning at
7:00pm. Be sure to dress to impress!

but rather, it appears as though you’ve trapped reality within
glass. This is most likely going to be the new generation

of three-dimensional film production because, frankly, the
glasses are a bit of hassle.

Either way, | have an issue with the new trend. | don't like
when a director seems more focused on having something
flying at the audience’s face instead of doing his or her job
of directing a good movie. Alice, for instance, just because
it was in 3D, Tim Burton felt the need to demonstrate the
crazy rabbit as always throwing dishes at the audience.

| was really getting sick of it. Tim Burton is an amazing
director and should not be swallowed up by this terrible
trend.

But, who knows, this might become permanent. When silent
films came out, people laughed and said the theater was
the way to go; then talkies appeared and people laughed
again saying that silent films were better. | guess we have
to get used to change sometime.

3D blue-ray player, TV screens, computer monitors, even
comic books are coming out in 3D. Do you believe that
there is an issue when people put all their resources toward
building technology that makes movies more realistic so
that we don’t have to experience life for ourselves? Do

you believe that money could be going towards something
useful? Or, are you jumping on the wagon and riding
towards a 3D world?

Many of this book’s reviews on the Internet are similarly
scathing towards Gould’s shamelessness. It’s not so much
that she shouldn’t be sharing so much information (she
used to blog for Gawker, for goodness sake) to the masses,
but more about how it’s delivered and how ultimately it is
not very interesting. If she did indeed have some great
revelation or profound piece of wisdom to impart, then
maybe an exception could be made for her attitude. But
she doesn’t. Her novel is pointless to read unless you are
a character from it, or if you are trying to sleep with her and
want to impress her by reading her novel. But be careful

— she'll probably cheat on you and write about it in her next

stunning book of memoirs.

Ultimately, Gould has received a number of curious readers
of her book (based on the amount of reviews online) so
perhaps she did reach her objective and could consider
And the Heart Says Whatever a success. There are worse
books that you could read, but overall, this book just isn’t
interesting so it might be best to pass this one up.

ONLINE SOURCE

ONLINE SOURCE

Be cool. Join the 3d trend