Over the Edge September 8-22

Life & Style Page 7

A House ts not a Home

Your new dorm may seem cold and mass produced, but there are ways to really make it fee like

By Ecaterina Ciugureanu || Features Editor

| am a UNBC Residence veteran. This is my 4" year living
on campus. Perhaps some of you think that is nothing to be
proud of, but | can confidently say that | have survived more
fire alarms than any individual firefighter in Prince George.
I’ve also had more roommates in 3 years than the amount of
Red Bulls Lindsay Lohan has had this week (and if you read
PerezHilton.com you know that’s a 3 digit number).

By now, | consider residence my second home (UNBC library
my first), and | thought | could share some tips on making
yourself feel more comfortable in the case your parents, like

home

mine, wanted to get rid of you the quickest way possible...by
dropping you off right on the footsteps of UNBC.

Speaking of parents, there will most definitely be at least
one moment along your independent living when you will miss
your relatives. It may be your first load of laundry or just a
stressful day when you will need somebody to talk to. If you
are close with your parent, | strongly recommend your room
decor involves something that reminds you of them. It can be
anything from a photo to a blanket or a pillow handcrafted
by your grandmother. Sure...sometimes parents get weird;
my mom prefers to send me off with a ridiculous amount of
religious paraphernalia and some Russian borsht, but that’s
just how she rolls. Parents are like teeth; you miss them when
they’re gone.

It’s okay to fall back into your childhood. Yes, | did watch
Toy Story 3 and yes | did cry, but that nonfiction account of a
toys’ perception of their owner is heartbreaking. In the past 3
years | would like to say | have seen it all: first blankies, first
diapers, you name it. The less weird items on the list include
a 10 year old Star Wars pillow case, which smelled like death
and a freakishly glorious collection of Dora the Explorer dolls
dressed up in different costumes (that’s right, the LESS weird
items). But hey, to each his own.

Although some believe photos steal a piece of your soul,
those glossy pieces of paper really can make a difference
sometimes. Plaster them on a wall or put them in frames,
those things can really be anchors of hope sometimes. It can
be a pet, a friend, a family member, a place where you would
rather be, or your one true hero. After a trip to Cuba, | have

S*&% My Grandma Says

If Green is the new black, then seniality is the new Miley Cirus

a lovely photo of Fidel Castro and Che Guevara pinned to my
desk. What can | say? It makes me smile. Just look at them
and think, “What were those bastards up to?”

Makes your room, truly yours. | always bring records and
Polaroids to my room, they make me feel the most at home.
At one point, | had the most ridiculous, disgusting shag carpet
in my room, some people even bring their own chairs because
the sky really is the limit. Fish (the only residence allowed
pet) can make one feel at home, but | would only recommend
that if you like attending bathroom fish funerals (In total, |
have accidentally murdered 4 gold fish in a span of a year).
Posters are another way to make a room your own. Just last
semester, my roommate chose to decorate numerous walls
with Pokémon posters. Sometimes, | would dream about them
since | had to look them every single day while | was brushing
my teeth.

Make friends. That is by far the most important part.
Friends are what totally makes a house a home. Don’t be a
douche, introduce yourself to your roomies and neighbours.
They will lend you a cup of sugar or carry you home when
you need it. Maybe your neighbours are the people you will
be spending Thanksgiving with - if your professors like to
schedule something worth a quarter of your mark after the
long weekend. This is super cheesy but | am going to tell
you anyways. On my very first day in residence, | met Emily
Gauvin. We are now about to live together for our 4" year.
We could be an ad for eHarmony or something. University is
a really awesome experience, it would be way better to have
something to reminisce with when it’s over.

4th Annual

ByEcaterina Ciugureanu || Features Editor

The Twitter feed under the title “Shit My
Dad Says” has taken the internet world by
storm this year. Written by Justin Halpern,

a book deal, which climbed to the number 1
spot, only weeks after its release. CBS also
chose to jump on the golden stallion that is
old people and developed a sitcom based
on the twitter feed. CBS even managed
to wrangle William Shatner for the show!
Honesty, if green is the new black, then
senile is the new Miley Cyrus!

While staying with my crazy grandma in
Eastern Europe this summer, | got a little
tired of rolling my eyes and gasping in
horror, so | got out a notepad and wrote
down the $h#t she says:

-It’s so hot out, | have to drink gin instead of water.

-Grandma do you want some tea?

-You know | don’t drink tea. | only drink coffee,
juice, gin, wine, whiskey, champagne, beer, rum,
vodka, brandy, and cognac.

-May God forgive me, but that woman is f#%*&d
up, oh well, God knows she is f#%&d up.

-9 am: Tea? Coffee? Cognac?

-Where are you going? | don’t care actually, but
bring me back ice cream.

-Of whiskey: Did you bring me back my medicine?

-When | was young, | was very good looking. | still
am actually.

- 3:50 pm: Katya, turn on my soap opera for me.

4:07pm: [talking to the TV] Moron! You are a
moron! Your husband is still ALIVE! He is just held
captive by your twin sister!

4:25pm: [snoring].

6:15pm: What? The show is over already?

the feed captures entertaining rants of
Justin’s father. In mere months, Justin got

The older you get, the less you care about what other people
think...apparently...

-The only thing derived from
Russian news: | have never
seen Putin wearing blue before.
He looks adorable in blue!

-Grandma, when
are we going home?
-I'll tell you this much, until the
vodka is done, we are not going
anywhere.

-| have sex dreams all the time,
but it’s okay because they're
about my dead husband.

-My blood pressure is seriously
low, Katya, can you go buy some
wine? Hurry!

-| don’t remember, did | already
drink my shot or did you not

pour
me any?

-Did you know that all people
who bite their nails are mentally
ill? You didn’t? You’re the worst
psychologist ever.

- Interupting a toast: Can we
drink already?

-Bottoms up and nobody leaves
until their glasses are empty!

UNBC Homecoming

Wed. September 22, 2010

Alumni Connections Speaker Series
Feat, James Adamson (BSc’o4)

James has been working on water supply
and hydrogeology projects in Haiti since
2006. He survived the devastating earthquake
that shocked the country in January and is
travelling from Haiti to share his experiences
with the relief and rebuilding efforts
6:00-800pm + UNBC Weldwood Theatre (7-238)
Free admission

Thut, September 23, 2010
Going Green at UNBC!

Feat. Doug Carter (UNBC Capital

Project Manage)

Learn how Canada’s Green University is leading |
the way in sustainability and what you can do |
to live green,

6:00-800pm + UNBC Weldwood Theatre (7-238)
Free admission

Fri.September 24, 2010

An Evening of Tapas and jazz

Feat, Music with Jeremy Stewart (BA’05/MA’10)
Join us for great food ond live music as we
celebrate the accomplishments of our Alumni

of the Year, Marguerite Kolie (BA 10), James
Adamson (BSc 04) and Janine North (CEO of
Northern Development Initiatives Trust).
700-10:00pm + UNBC Bentley Centre

Tickets: $20 in advance (incl tapas and J drink)

Everyone welcome!

RSVP by Friday September 17, 2010

For more info or to register

Go to: wwwunbe.ca/alumni

Phone: 250-960-5873 or 1-866-937-6668
-mail: alumniaunbe.ca

Visit: UNBC Alumni Relations, NUGSS, GSS
and Nancy 0's

os

Sat. September 25, 2010

Homecoming Golf Tournament

Texas Scramble, Minimum two UNBC graduates
pet foursome, Winners will be awarded our
silver championship teophy, the Ted Sadler Jug.
Breakfast at 10:00am + Aspen Grove Golf Course.

| $50.00 per person in advance only
|(incl pancake breakfast, round of gol, and prizes)

Shane Lake Nature Walk

‘& Family Picnic
| eat, Doug Thompson (BSC ‘o1 & MSC '06)

| UNBC Instructors Ted Binnema (History) &

Karyn Sharp (First Nations Studies)

| Take a guided stroll in UNBC's backyard
{to learn more about traditional ecological
|knowledge and the variety of flora and fauna in

|the area. Pack a littecless lunch and bring your
| camera to participate in our photo scavenger

|hunt, Beverages & snacks provided,

Rain or shine

| Meet at UNBC in Parking Lot C at 1:00am sharp
/ Tickets: by donation to the UNBE Alumni

Association Undergraduate Scholarship

TWolves vs, Alumni
Basketball Games
Watch alumni take on the Timberwolves!

Women 6:00pm, Men 7:30pm + Charles Jago
Northern Sports Centre (NSC)

|Admission: by donation at the door to Shinerama
| Students fighting Cystic Fibrosis

|Alumni & Friends Pub Night

jFeat. Dj Zander & Dj AK (Bcomm ‘06)

‘Party at the Moose with the best Dis in town!
|$00pn-1200an + The Thirsty Moose Pub

| Tickets: $5 in advance and at the door or FREE for

oo, . | UNBC Alumni who register in advance
Space is limited so get your tickets soon!

Thank you to our sponsors: CKPG ITV

i)
RAMADA

“Ging, 6,

esti a