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Over the Edge, March 10-24 201 o|

Madame Mayhem’s F my Horoscope

The planets are aligned these next two weeks in such a way that all signs will find them-
selves drawn towards the kitchen. Everyone has been entertaining lately, and it’s leading to
some great social time. This is the cosmos telling you to cook more — or perhaps eat out more.
ARIES

An attempt at eggplant flambé goes horribly wrong. You can say goodbye to your damage
deposit now.

Lucky numbers: 9-1-1.
TAURUS

Dear Taurus, no matter how long you stare at that soufflé it’s not going to rise. You'll just have
to win your guests over with your charm. Oh, that’s right, what charm?

Lucky numbers: 8, 23, 0.
GEMINI

Really, Gemini? You thought that sole and merlot were an appropriate pairing? Wrong!
Everyone knows it’s white wine with fish. The chocolate crickets for dessert are probably not
going to go over well either. At least no one’s going to say that you’re boring.

Lucky numbers: 2, 7, 3.

CANCER

You cooked a beautiful meal for your friends and/or family, but the social tension is killing
you. Out with whatever you have to say or you'll give yourself indigestion worrying over it.
Lucky numbers: 7, 24, 32.
LEO

Everyone came to your party, good thing you got them to bring things because you forgot
that social gatherings when you're involved require food for a horde. There was a minor fire in
the kitchen, but you managed to quell it quickly enough. The price for all of this: that pile of
dishes and empties that you now have to clean up.

Lucky numbers: 2 helpers conscripted, 5 hours of cleaning, and 1 dead body to dispose of.
VIRGO

You hosted a brunch, but it was unfortunately not perfect and therefore a catastrophe. The
pancakes didn’t come out right, the whipped cream didn’t whip, and you chipped your coffee
Bodum. Poor Virgo, what a disaster!

Lucky numbers: 6 guests, 10 freak outs, and 5 people leaving satisfied.

LIBRA

You and your honey cooked up a storm with local in-season vegetables (cheap and sus-
tainable) this weekend. That’s right, you'll be eating cabbage soup for a little while now.

Lucky numbers: 4, 8, 84.
SCORPIO

Yeah, those eggs were a little overdue.

Lucky numbers: I'll tell you once you’re done throwing up.
SAGITARIUS

You can burn water right now; it may be best if you stay out of the kitchen in general and go
visit some other sign to beg a meal or two, Sag.
Lucky numbers: 89, 34, 23.
AQUARIUS
Well, you got the exact measurements of the recipe right and did precisely what you were
supposed to do. Too bad you read the ingredients wrong. That’s going to be hard to clean up.
Lucky numbers: 74, 237, 9.
PISCES

No one came to your dinner party (they were all at Leo’s). Why don’t you go cry about it
now?
Lucky numbers: 0, 0, 0. No one.

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en matiére financiére du Canada

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