8 January 27, 2010 + Over the Edge Kali’s Killer Sudoku et Ee Et ye Madame Mayhem’s F my Horoscope Ah, technology, It began when our first hominid ancestor picked up a rock and used it to hit another rock and it hasn't stopped since. In fact, technology is evolv- ing so quickly that you can buy a cell phone today and have it outdated within months when a new one with a screen just that much bigger/smaller/multi-task- ing comes out, Wikipedia, social media, and handheld devices that allow you to stay tapped in to what's going on around you at all times have changed the way that we live in the world today. If we were to go back to Ogg and Gog hitting rocks together, most of us wouldn't have the skills to survive. On the other hand, Ogg doesn't know how to tweet. This week, radiation from the sun will be boggling up our technology and you may find yourself nostalgic for a simpler time. When all else fails, I suggest bang- ing some rocks together, If they're the right kind of rocks you may end up discov- This morning you went to your local big-box department store to buy the new handheld game/phone/web/music/video/vibrator(hells yes!) /camera device. You bought one (boy was the store busy!) and promptly broke it. Good job Aries. C U P c ro S SWO rd Lucky numbers: 1-800-I-FIX. CROSSWORD PUZZLES PROVIDED BY BESTCROSSWORDS.COM TAURUS (HTTP://WWW.BESTCROSSWORDS.COM). USED WITH PERMISSION Across 1- Pursue; 6- 100 dinars 10- With the bow, in music 14- Judges’ garments 15- Old Dodge model 16- Sharp bristle 17- Golf clubs 18- Group 19- Busy as __ 20- Decoration at the top of a chair leg 21- Universality 24- Body of retainers 26- Dodges 27- Agt.s take 28- Business accounts 30- Lake in the Sierra Nevada 33- Lump of chewed food 34- Yes, in Yokohama 37- Ancient Athenss Temple of ___ 38- Tears 39- Metrical foot 40- Casino area 41- Haunted house sounds 42- Navajo dwelling 43- Spacious 44- Attach by stitches 45- Declare 48- Leading 52- Supple arms and legs 55- Actress Balin 56- Della’s creator 57-“East of Eden” director Kazan 58- Destined 60- Env, notation 61- Bank deposit? 62- Free laces, say 63-___ accompli 64-“No Ordinary Love” singer 65- Big cats; Down 1- Old newsman 2- Goddesses of the seasons 3- Cancel 4- DC bigwig 5- Spirit 6- Scoundrel 7- Muslim elder and prayer-leader 8- Actress Heche 9- Woody 10- Calculating device 11- Violently intense 12- Minotaur’s home 13- Follows orders 22- Director's cry 23- Sorts 25- Wall St. debuts 28- Attractive 29- Auto pioneer 30- Faucet 31- Jackie's second 32- Riled (up) 33- Ray of light 34- Crone 35- Doc bloc; 6- Son of, in Arabic names 38- Like vagabonds 39- Caucus state 41- Additional 42- Attentive 43- Take as an affront 44-“____ loves you, yeah, yeah, yeah” 45- Shake like 46- A bit, colloquially 47- Conductor Georg 48- Become less intense, die off 49- As before 50-__ a million 51- Loses color 53- Bones found in the hip 54- Temperate 59- Black bird You refused to get that GPS system your parents were nagging you to buy be- fore your next outdoor adventure trip, didn't you? No ones heard where you are for the past few days... maybe you should stop and ask for directions. Lucky numbers: 53° 54 48.8 N, 122° 45 0.7 W. GEMINI You posted too many Tweets too quickly and broke Twitter. That's right, you broke Twitter. Now no one will know what you're thinking and doing every sec- ond of every day of your life. Agonizing, isn't it? Lucky numbers: 78, 23, 19 CANCER You found a gorgeous antique lamp for $10 today, good job. You even had the perfect spot to place it in your home. Unfortunately, your place is wired up a bit funny and antique lamps have rather non-standard electrical plugs. That was 100 Volts of alternating current, by the way. Lucky numbers: 10, 100, 1000. LEO Those pictures from the party last weekend are on Facebook. Also, your boss called, wants to have a word. Said it had to do with your position at the company. As did your significant other... said something about your position on someone at the party. Oh, and your mom. Lucky numbers: 250-533-8728 (seriously, call your mom first!) VIRGO You can't seem to figure out the new handheld game/phone/web/music/video/ vibrator/camera device you bought today, but you're scared that if you open it up you ll break it. Quick, call a teenager! Lucky numbers: 14, 15, 16. PS: You've got the protective cover over the screen still, just pull it off. LIBRA Now that you've got your professors convinced that Wikipedia is indeed a rea- sonable source of citable information the biggest web hack scandal yet to break out has occurred. Someone has replaced Wikipedia with the entirety of TV Tropes, the Harry Potter Wiki, and some of the more memorable entries from 4chan's /b/. Lucky numbers: 23, 09, 298. SCORPIO Awesome job with that web hack of Wikipedia, Scorpio. Lucky numbers: 16, 7, 23, 1. SAGITARIUS There was a troll on the message board that you moderate so you wrote them an angry message requesting that they get off your board. They didn’t reply and now you can't seem to log in to any part of the board. Lucky numbers: 3423 was your password, but it’s not working. Try 6969. CAPRICORN You rushed to the store first thing this morning to get the latest handheld game/phone/web/music/video/vibrator/camera device from a local big-box department store, They even had them on sale! However, as soon as the doors were opened you were trampled! How dare they keep you from it, you need it for school/work! Lucky numbers: $200 regular price, $75 on sale, 0 left in store. AQUARIUS With Twitter broken, you spent the night playing Farmland on Facebook and didn’t get to bed until 6am. This caused you to sleep through all your classes, including the one with an assignment due — the assignment that was worth 50% of your grade. Lucky numbers: 6, 50, 0. PISCES After pouring all your deepest, darkest secrets into your blog you realize that last night you posted the link to it on a friend's Facebook wall as opposed to in a private message. No Pisces, none of your entries are locked. Lucky numbers: 13, 98, 3.