Eat This Article

on the beauty of vandalism

By Jeremy Stewart

Many years of wandering Prince George’s mean streets
have enlightened me to a few basic truths about the uni-
verse.

“Death to Geeks”

“Sluts Only [Parking]”

“Plant Posies Beneath the Pavement”

These words of wisdom and others have graced our
picturesque bus stops, bridges, alleys, and street signs.
Every place a visitor may travel in our fair city will bring
them face to face with the scribblings of the local wits.
You can find advice-”Stop Campbell”-You can find warn-
ings-Trespassers Will Be Beaten With Rebar’-You can
even find heartfelt expressions of the soul’s desiring-
“FREEDOM.” The variety of these messages is as broad
as an inquisitive mind could hope for. But, you may
wonder, what do these writings mean? What's the sig-
nificance of their locations? Who is putting them there?
Who cleans it up?

I, for one, don’t care who cleans up. In fact, I'd rather
that no one did; I want to be able to enjoy these artefacts
for years to come. I consider vandalism to be the peo-
ple’s voice, no less valid than the art that adorns the
walls of, say, the Lascaux Caves in France. It is a docu-
ment of the times, perfectly reflective of the zeitgeist; it is
an artistic achievement on the part of its creator; it is an
uncensored forum for public debate. Why would anyone
want to “clean up” the articulation of the will of the
masses?

Sometimes, you'll find poetic relationships between
where the vandals strike and what they mean to commu-
nicate that indicate a high level of forethought and cre-
ativity. Near a local golf course: ’Kill Golf Kills.” On the
side of a local radio station’s office: “We Want The
Airwaves Back.” Beneath the Yellowhead Bridge: “Pink
Floyd.” I don’t think I need to explain the brilliance

evinced by these works.

For those not in the know, the underside of the
Yellowhead Bridge is one of the prime locations to
observe the local colour. “I’m Sorry Leah,” says one
heartsick lover. “Pantera,” proudly boasts a passionate
heavy metal aficionado. Way out, at the first concrete
support post, suspended high over the muddy Fraser
with no visible means of anchoring oneself, any passerby
can spot the name of Craig Sache, who in Feb. 2001
apparently managed not to die while leaving his name
and date to mark the feat. Truly, a hero to the common
man.

There is a smattering of that artistic graffiti stuff that
everyone was so wild about in the mid 90s. Under the
bridge on University Way, you can spot the wacky art of
some local graffitists. The water tower above the inter-
section of the highways (a no-trespassing location; don’t
get busted) can be found some of our most notable works
of this kind. This art doesn’t do much for me, I’m afraid,
as I’m unable to read it. It certainly is colourful and
stylised, though.

The people behind all this action are a mysterious
bunch (aside from Craig Sache, who is obviously a
depressed teen). Some of them want us to know that
“Matt is a [sic] Vergin.” Others want to share ideas of
some conceivable relevance. These people are probably
young, sneaky, and have little respect for others’ private
property. Hey, that’s like me and my friends! Which of
you creeps has been having fun without me?

One trend that has got me excited is the use of public
defacement of property for genuine activism. Way to
subvert regular media channels and bring the message
into people’s everyday lives! “Liar, Liar” with a stencil of
George W. Bush’s face has popped up on a number of
surfaces lately. “Shave George Bush” in the men’s room
near the Over The Edge office (coincidence...?). “Stop

”

Bush” on the back of a stop sign on 20th Avenue.
Something to the tune of “End Our Corporate Bondage”
in the alley behind Suzu-Ran. People, this is good news!
Finally, our walls are being put to better use than “Hash”
or “Chan Man” or “If You Read This, You Are Gay/ Les
(note the inclusive language-could it be the work of pro-
gressive homophobes?).”

“It is a document of the times,
perfectly reflective of the Zeit-
geist; it is an artistic achievement
on the part of its creator; it is an
uncensored forum for public
debate. Wy would anyone want
to “clean up” the articulation of
the will of the masses?”

What would be the best way to get involved? Well,
first you want to buy a big smelly felt marker... get that
thing out of your nose! Then, become informed on
important issues and come up with snappy ways to
express your position so that anyone on the street could
grasp the implications of your view immediately. Oh,
you don’t want that? Well, you could stop writing bigot-
ed remarks everywhere. Oh, that wasn’t you? I’m sorry;
it must have been someone else. I've got it! Read the
words around you, think about them, and imagine how
you would respond to them in person... you get the idea.
And for goodness sake, stop erasing the inspired words
of the freedom fighters on your block!